Take Your Life Back

Audio By Carbonatix

Yes or no: when you look at your calendar, do you dread next week’s coming because you have far too many things on your “to do” list and barely enough time to do them? Yes or no: you get anxious when you schedule a new event, because you worry that you’re booking yourself too tightly? Yes or no: some nights, you take pills to help you sleep—you’ve got so much on your mind that you can’t stop thinking long enough to get some rest? Yes or no: you’ve managed to pack your schedule so far in advance that you can’t see an end in sight? Yes or no: you haven’t spent much time with your family lately?

 If you responded with “yes” to any of these statements, you probably already know that you’re too busy. You probably already know that you’ve filled your life so full that it’s kept you from actually having a life. You probably already know that it would be nice to experience a change. What you might not know is that it’s time for you to take your life back. That’s right—your life needs to be taken back, and you are the one who needs to do it. Sadly, I know this from personal experience. I have the realization on occasion, especially when I’m overwhelmed by an ever-growing lineup of projects, obligations, and responsibilities—I begin to realize that I am no longer running my life. Instead, I have gotten to a point where my life is running me.  It usually isn’t the big things, really, but a slow accumulation of little things that have added up enough to eventually take over. It is the countless minor tasks I was contributing to at the office. It is the twenty years’ worth of casual friendships I am maintaining. It is small projects here, quick ventures there, and five-minute commitments everywhere. They are good things, but there are so many of them that I was being spread thin. In trying to do everything, I wasn’t doing much of anything well. In keeping track of my secondary relationships, I was neglecting primary ones. In pursuing what mightmatter eventually, I was overlooking the things that mattered already. In those moments, I realize that my life is horribly out of balance, but I get too caught up in it to recognize the warning signs right away. My first warning sign is usually when I become edgy and impatient with my family. If there’s one area where I want to be successful in life, it’s in my own family. When my energy and focus suffer at home because of stresses outside the home, I know it’s time to make some adjustments. How about you? Is your family life in proper balance today? Is the best of your time reserved for the people most important to you, or are your loved ones getting edged out by other concerns? Is it time for you to make some adjustments? If so, try the three that work best for me: 1. Grab your calendar by the neck—it’s time for you to tell it what to do for a change. Take responsibility for your life, and learn to say “no” more often. Only you can cram your life too full; only you can make your schedule bearable. 2. Identify what “balance” looks like in your life, and establish some boundaries to make sure balance happens. Give yourself a curfew, commit to subtract a responsibility whenever you add one—whatever it takes to maintain a healthy balance. 3. Tell people that you’re taking your life back. Explain that things will be different from now on, and ask them to support and encourage you in the process. Go ahead, give these a try. They’ll weed out excessive commitments, and they’ll give you a life again—and not just any life, a life where you can win at home.